A few things have come to the Beard's attention and he has asked me to clarify a few most basic man rules. These are the rules that are a very part of the fabric of being a man. Even beard-less members of the Clan of Man understand that these rules are to be followed.
1. You shall not lay hands on a woman in a malicious manner. This includes allowing another to do so. This also includes when a woman makes you very angry. i.e. Not making an appropriate sandwich, constantly having multiple tv shows recording so you have to pretend to ask permission to change a channel, or waiting to begin a conversation until the game is in the fourth quarter.
NOT OK
2. You shall not attempt to engage in conversation with another man in a public restroom. This includes movie theatres, football games, restaurants, etc. This excludes if by random chance you are sitting in an adjacent stall from someone you know and begin the contest of trying to gross the other one out first.
3. You shall never, never, ever, ever, never put on football cleats and kick another man in his unmentionables. This particularly applies if you are a repeat dirty football player on a losing team that has a hard time understanding how to behave. Also particularly applies to you if you are 6' 4" and 310 lbs. Watch below, learn, and please teach the children.
Honorable mention man rules. - "don't drink the last beer in any fridge or cooler you did not pay for" : "don't hate on Beards" : "Carve the turkey" : "Work hard, Play Hard, but especially Work Hard" : "Happy Wife, Happy Life" : "Self-Assessment good, Self-Pity bad"
HA! you're hysterical. On a second look that was totally an intentional kick to the nuts
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